Friends, Romans, countrymen ... there are those who will tell you that candy is a "sometimes food," and that the only hearts that matter are the slimy, pulsing ones within our chest cavities. We are here to tell you that those people are LIARS and most likely COMMUNISTS who are trying to undermine a PERFECTLY WONDERFUL AMERICAN HOLIDAY that was brought to us years ago by the Hallmark corporation.

Anyway, if you've got designs on being the neighborhood candy man, this is the item for you. When used, February 2007's item of the month from Mr. Store gives you a permanent skill that lets you summon candy hearts. They can be inscribed and sent to others, or consumed for various nifty effects.