It all started out as an average ascension run, until Randomcyn tried her skeleton key in the Perplexing door. The skeleton sat behind the table, as she expected, but something was ... different. For starters, there were no dice on the table.
"Um. I'm here for the stone tablet?" ventured Randomcyn.
"Yes, you are," grinned the skeleton. "But you know what? I'm off the dice thing. It was getting old, y'know? I'm thinking that this time, you're going to have to work a little harder to get into the courtyard. You might, dare I say it, have to think a little today! How do you like them apples?"
Randomcyn narrowed her eyes. The day she got outsmarted by a skeleton was the day she hung up her plexiglass for good. "Bring it, bones," she snarled.
"Last week, I set up a little game I like to call The Really Evil Scavenger Hunt. First, I created three teams of three people each. I'm a swell guy, so I gave the teams some flattering names:"
"Rule one! At the end of nine turns, each person must have collected exactly one item from each location. No more, no less."
"Rule two! On any given turn, only one person, regardless of what team they're on, can be in a given location."
"Rule thr--"
"You know," interrupted Randomcyn, "this is sounding an awful lot like a certain murder mystery puzzle from earlier in the year."
"Ssh!" grinned the skeleton. "Rule three! After turns three, six, and nine, I collected the nine items gathered by each team over the previous three turns. To make things spicy, all nine items presented by a team at a checkpoint had to come from nine different locations."
"Rule four! ... Well, no. There were actually only three rules. Any questions?"
"Oh, your job is simple," giggled the skeleton. "All you have to do is figure out who went where, and when. And of course, who won, and when."
"Won?" asked Randomcyn, raising an eyebrow. "It sounds like all three teams had to pick up the same number of items. Did any of the teams get disqualified or something?"
"Oh, no no," said the skeleton, "everyone played by the rules, I assure you. But it just so happens that on one of the turns, a Mr. Accessory dropped at one of the locations. The team that had a player in that location on that turn won the scavenger hunt. You need to figure out which team won, on which turn they won, and where all of the players (on all the teams) were on that turn."
"Sounds like I need a lot more information to get started," mused Randomcyn. "I don't even know who was playing. And how am I supposed to figure out where the Accessory dropped?"
The skeleton pointed to the word "EVIL" in large block letters on the whiteboard. "I guess you'll have to ask around. Start with Gemelli ... that guy sounds like he has a story to tell."
"Remind me why I'm doing this, again?" Randomcyn growled.
The skeleton dangled a stone tablet just out of cyn's reach, and smiled. "Oh, and since I'm in a festive mood, what the heck -- if you're fast, I'll throw in the Mr. Accessory, too. Now, chop chop! Don't want to keep the golems waiting!"
Randomcyn made a vulgar hand gesture and reached for her pencil and paper.
When you're ready to submit an entry, please send an email (NOT kmail) to: thereallyevilskeleton@gmail.com ... your entry must include:
Multiple entries may be submitted within reason; we will only count the last entry submitted by any player. Do not submit entries from your multis; anyone strongly suspected of violating this rule will be disqualified. "Guess spammers" will be disqualified, baleeted, drawn, and quartered. We will not confirm if an entry is correct until the contest is complete.
Please don't spoil any solutions in open chat or the forums. If a major spoiler is posted, the contest may be closed prematurely.
The contest will run from Monday, Sept 26 until rollover on Friday, Sept 30. Prizes will be announced on Monday, October 3.
1337 Puzzl0r: The first 10 correct entries will be eligible for the following prizes (drawn at random):
All other entries in the top 10 will win special bonus prizes (TBD, but they'll be decent.)
Skeleton Smacker: We will draw lots for the following prizes from the pool of all correct entries:
And yes, you can win more than one prize. If you're the first one to submit a correct entry, you could win three :)
Gemelli: Um, are you sure I'm the right person to help you? I think there's someone who knows a lot more than me that you could ask ... they might even know who won. Well, anyway. Turns out I got put on the Lobotomites team, which I thought was neat. I got to the Casino just as SilliusSoddus was leaving, and grabbed a lime from the slots. I got lucky and scooped up the Hey Deze map on the turn that Baron Mind was at the Casino.
Baron Mind: Like I told the skeleton, I couldn't play on the same team as The Flying Guillotine; don't ask. Anyway. I was at the Icy Peak on the turn when Nolij was hunting for tires. Oh, and I hit the Casino on the turn just after Maeldwyn was there. Got me a cherry while SilliusSoddus was beating up a knob goblin bean counter, just to watch him die. Or to steal his hat. Whatever. Actually, themightytango got a cherry too, on the same turn that I scored a meat stack.
Nolij: [Profile] Squawk! Don't mind my parrot; I picked him up while Gemelli was "working" the lemon party. I was looking for tires right before checking in with the skeleton for the second time, but all I got was this lousy cog. And on the turn before that, I heard Gemelli beat up a monster just to take his guitarrr. What an asshole! I picked up some pr0n legs on the turn when gulo was hassling the Friars ... that was later, definitely past the halfway point. There's something I'm forgetting ...
[Display Case] Oh, teams, right. I'm a little hazy on the teams stuff ... I know I wasn't on Maeldwyn's team. Oh, and if themightytango and gulogulo were on the same team, I wasn't on The Flying Guillotine's team.
bluespace: Hey, do you like my wig? I picked that up while The Flying Guillotine was hanging out with the Friars. I don't remember much about The Flying Guillotine from the game, but I know he wasn't on Gemelli's team. And I grabbed this weird fanfic thing the turn after I got the wig ... no, I don't remember what happened after that. The fanfic was that creepy.
themightytango: I woke up and went right to the slots ... got a cherry on the first pull, jackpot! Oh, and just before I went to bed, I spotted Nolij beating someone up for a green pixel, while I scored a nice, frilly skirt. By the way, I was on the same team as bluespace ... hawt!
gulogulo: Don't listen to the Friars; they can't actually drink worth a damn. At least I got this hellion cube ... right after checking in with that bastard skeleton. And I grabbed a crowbarrr on the turn after that. I'll shiver your timbers! As far as what team I was on, I can't remember. I was either on Baron Mind's team, or on bluespace's team.
Maeldwyn: Team Poor Impulse Control, represent! I had an interesting encounter with a furry giant, if you know what I'm saying and I think you do. Baron Mind got there just as I was leaving; I think he had just left the treasury. Later on, I farmed me some beans, then went to check in with the skeleton, then scooped up a white pixel just after that. And I grabbed an orange from the lemon party kind of late ... I'm pretty sure that was the same turn that The Flying Guillotine was fighting the octoroc.
SilliusSoddus: Yeah, I was at the Casino. I got there just after tango left. I picked up this weird 334 scroll on the turn when Maeldwyn was farming for pixels. I brought a Knob Goblin Visor and a penguin skin to the final checkpoint, along with another item... I forget what, but I picked it up on the turn before gulogulo beat up some pirates. Teams, hmm ... I'll just say this: If gulogulo and themightytango weren't on the same team, I was on Gemelli's team. Otherwise, I was teamed up with Maeldwyn.
TheFlyingGuillotine: I wasn't on a team with gulogulo or themightytango, sucks to be me. But anyway: booze! I scored a can of Imp Ale while Baron Mind was staring at the chore wheel. I got a jumbo olive while Gemelli was at the Cove, and picked up a red pixel while Nolij was checking out the pr0n.
randomcyn: [Profile] Oh, did you want to know who won the scavenger hunt? Ssshh! Spies are everywhere ... I can't just tell you!
[Display Case] Wow, you're persistent. So you really want to know, eh? Fine ... I'll give you a shove in the right direction:
If you need help decoding it, think about a cipher that Nietzsche might have used. Oh, and the keys are the name of the last person to visit the Casino, and the name of the last person to visit the Treasury.